The Second Harvest - PHWAR!

Full Moon + Equinox = Liftoff! (Carlsbad, 8/10)

So I really was intending to blog a few days ago to discuss the Second Harvest, which falls at the Fall Equinox, aka Mabon, in the Northern Hemisphere. I was going to talk about giving thanks for all of the abundance in your life and holding that vibration of gratitude as we move forward.
However.
The Universe had other ideas.

As the moon waxed to full at just about the same time we hit the midpoint of Autumn, I got a huge download of energy in my life. Physically, it felt like I drank a six-pack of Red Bull; I was humming on all cylinders and feeling uber-enthusiastic about Life, the Universe, and Everything again, even with a rare bout of insomnia thrown in for variety! This was especially refreshing after the major heavy lifting I'd been doing in my soul and in the Astral planes, clearing out some very deeply held "muggle-muck" from my system, and from the Collective as well, if my suspicions are correct.
In my environs, I transformed into the Decluttering Diva, tackling first my bathroom, then the kitchen! I have yet to go underneath the kitchen sink (can we say "hazardous waste dump," boys and girls?!) but those areas that have been decluttered and reorganized look and feel much better - the chi is beginning to flow nicely! :-)
As for the wider world at large, I suddenly found myself with not one but TWO job interviews on the same day! (Yes, I am still doing something of a job search, mainly to keep mother from yelling at me. Do me a favor and don't tell her, 'mkay?) I made both of those interviews and will see what, if anything, comes of them. On the metaphysical front, I'm way more excited about giving out my first two intuitive readings over Skype this past week! They will be the first of many as I raise my profile in the world, I'm sure!

Looking back, it's been six months since I left the muggle-job world for the second time. It occurred to me as I was summing up the time that had passed between harvests that this time has been, overall, low-key. Sure, there's been movement and excitement and lovely things happening in my life between the Equinoxes, but it feels like I was detached in certain ways.
I was stepping out of the "reality" that is commonly agreed upon and into the wider space of What Truly Is. In doing so, there were certain long-held Shadows that had to be realized, assimilated, and transcended...for they would no longer fit within me in this new space that I was/am coming to inhabit more and more fully. (I just read back what I've typed and the only thing I can say is, "Whoa!" Instant channeling - COOL!)

So, yeah - this is the second of the three Harvests. This is usually the most jovial of the Harvest celebrations, because we are basking in the Bounty of the Great Mother that we are taking in, and awestruck at just at How Much we truly have! Give Thanks for your personal bounty (and yes, there are positive things that are bounty*full in your life!) and hold that vibe of Gratitude first and foremost in your awareness for the next little while. Eventually you might surprise yourself by being able to hold it every day. You never know...

And if we're indeed all interconnected on very deep levels, then I will simply advise against putting too much stock in the plans you make - for your day/week, for your future, for your life overall. I say this because: since the new moon earlier this month, most, if not all, of the plans I've made in my life have been tossed out the window, over and over again, in favor of experiencing what is unfolding within & before me "in this very moment."
Fortunately I have very cool friends who understand the concepts of flexibility and fluidity - and if they don't, they're keeping their own counsel. ;-)
Ergo, if I'm getting a "parameter revision" to be less structured and more free-form in my life, odds are there's at least one other person also receiving this "revision." If said person is reading these words...hello, friend. No worries; we're all swirling in the soup together, as a very wise woman once said.

three "p-words"

No, these are not going to be words that would get your mouth washed out with soap if your mom or dad heard you say them.
I'll introduce you to two of these three words right now: Procrastination and Perfection.

I have joked off and on about being a "recovering perfectionist," but it appears it's been no joke. These two things have been holding me back - a realization that's come fully into my awareness with this lunation, when I was all ready for Go-Time to help me take off...and I find myself still sputtering along, by and large.

To paraphrase the wise and wonderful SARK, who has such excellent descriptions of these two Shadows: Procrastination says "Not Now" and Perfection says "Not Yet." Procrastination has been following Perfection's lead like a good little Shadow, very eager and supportive.
Perfection has been whispering in my ear, You need to wait until you've left home. You need to wait until this event (or that event) has unfolded. You need to wait until all of your Shadow-stuff has been Resolved. You need to wait until all of your talents have been fully realized.
Darling Shadow, if I keep waiting for the "perfect whatever," I will be perfectly DEAD, and kicking myself in the Afterlife for Not Acting when I had the perfect opportunity - while I still drew breath into my denser flesh-body!

When I brought this up, I was shown their motivation, which is the third "p-word" that is relevant to this moment: Protection. This is something I'm very familiar with, having done some rather interesting things (in various lifetimes besides this one!) out of a heightened need for what could be called "Self-Preservation."
This pair of Shadows simply wants to protect me from all things that might be considered "bad," such as failure, humiliation, lawsuits, and (gods forfend!) assaults upon my person. Um, darlings, I'm not stupid, for one...and I run Dragon energy, for another. I think I know a thing or two about defending myself from various forms of assault!
I do, however, appreciate their concern. This also proves one of Debbie Ford's excellent points: Shadows are often protective mechanisms that have run amok, and need to be revised (at least) or dismantled (at most). I think I'm somewhere in the middle with these two.

They mean well - but at some point, I need to "risk" failure if I'm to gain success. Time for this snake to shed her skin, and release these Shadows... :-)

From the Wetware: Optimizing GO-Time!

Window into the future as it begins to manifest into the present. (Northern CA, 1/09)

Talking with soul-siblings over the past few days, we're all in agreement that something BIG is on the horizon; various articles I've read, along with a few news items that have blipped on my personal radar screen, confirm this feeling.
Guess what?
Go-Time starts TODAY!

From the new moon (9/8) to the full moon (9/23 or so), there is a huge energetic pulse enfolding us. This is what normally happens every year on the way to the Equinox, which in some parts of the world will be occurring on the exact same day as the full moon! Oh yeah...Shift is Happening!
The advice I'm receiving about this fortnight of activity - Be Mindful of what you're asking for, and Be Specific as well!

You've heard the expressions, "Be careful what you wish for, because you're going to get it," and "Energy flows where Attention goes," yes? These are going to be your guideposts. Examine your thoughts, your wishes, your desires with a microscope to make sure you're in total alignment with your Full Authentic Power! This is a time where the gap between Intention and Manifestation is going to be very small, if extant at all! :-o
Now, remember when I said Mercury Retrograde was a good time to revise your Master Plan? This is the time to roll it out. As you do, be specific. Be active. Be current. Be positive. Dream not just big, but uber-gigantic!
If you like to use metaphors: get out your favorite color of balloon tonight. Blow into it a little bit every day for the next two weeks. At the full moon/Equinox, let the balloon go into the Universe, totally confident that your dreams are manifesting even now, as you read this! HUZZAH! :-)

In case you're curious, I'll be fine-tuning my energies during this time, cultivating the lotus of Feminine Energy as she continues to bloom within me and erasing a few remaining vestiges of resistance that I've found within me, still clinging stubbornly like barnacles on a rock within my physical being...
What shall we co-create today, hmmm? :-D

me too...

"Reversing the Tide." (Encinitas, 7/10)
The flower above is a metaphor. Normally, they bloom very black; however, I can "choose" what color the flower within me is going to bloom...

I'm not just dipping my hand into the energetic pools that underpin the Universe and telling y'all how the water tastes. I drink these handfuls and do the Work alongside everyone as well.

This Mercury Retrograde tapped me on the shoulder and brought something to my attention: there has been one Shadow following me around on tiptoe since 2002. I've called it different things over the years...my Kundalini Hunger. Sacred Fire. Receiving Love Generously. Awaiting my Beloved. After all, I was born a Woman, and I have the same dreams and desires (and doubts) that every other woman possesses, whether or not we choose to admit that we're carrying them!
It's not just about entering Right Relationship, though. It's also about recognizing and honoring my softer, more gentle feminine side. More, still - I need to give her the space she's been craving to breathe and move and dance, to express herself openly, boldly, and In Public! :-o
She has come up with every other Shadow I've worked with in my curious, intense, and miraculous process of Spiritual Alchemy, but until this waning moon, I've never fully resolved her.
"We shall lift each other up." (Balboa Park, 7/09)

It's taken finding my home tribe, and allowing myself to be supported by their Unconditional Acceptance. It's taken shifting my shape, dropping a crazy-good amount of weight and letting go of stuff like sugar and gluten and dairy once and for all. It's taken the full real-I-zation of my Authentic Power in the safe space that is co-created through true heart-centered community.

When I went into the Moon Lodge this past week(ish) and began to bleed, I dove in. I dove deep.
In the heart of Darkness, I raised this Shadow into the light of my full Awareness. I saw where I was stuck and I allowed her to Speak True...and there was an adjustment. I felt it in my body, the release of sticking tensions, a realignment and relaxation of lower-chakra energies.
Tossing the labels of "masculine" and "feminine" out the window, I simply asked for Authenticity - and I got it.
I. Got. It.
The gentle lotus of yin has bloomed within me, and the fragrance is exquisitely sweet!
Welcome Home. (Encinitas, 7/10)

The rest, as the moon wanes and renews, is weaving this energy in with all my other threads, and finding a new balance point.
The rest, as Mercury returns to a direct journey through the stars, is to find new ways of expressing this femininity outwardly. Let me see...bright colors slightly outside my usual palette, swirling skirts, and a pink cowgirl hat that "clashes" with everything else I own. These sound like good starting points.
Or maybe I'll pair that brown tank top that frills down at the edges with my new brown leggings and don a pair of pixie-wings... ;-)