Friday, August 7, 2009

floating to the surface once more :-)

It has been a wild ride, Mr. Toad, these past few weeks. Where do I begin?
After my play-date...

After my play-date in Balboa Park, I exploded again. A block of emotion around my heart suddenly thawed out, and surged out of me. I think the last time I wept that intensely was after my father passed. Or maybe Brother Ten-Spots, my extra special cat. Regardless, I cleared out a LOT of stuff that Sunday evening...and knew it was time to move into the next phase of my Work.

I do my deep Work on two levels: within, using (semi-)guided meditations, and without, using specific objects. I find I do my most effective Work with objects I can hold in my hands, see with my eyes, manipulate on the material level. So I got myself a pouch to wear around my neck, filled it with objects...and Shadows, negative statements written with red ink on white strips of paper. Why? To pray over them and transform them. I called these strips of paper my "lovely bones."

So I've been wearing the pouch with the "lovely bones" in them, and praying over them, and visionquesting/trancing with them - along with a super-powerful smokey quartz.
Quick tangent: have you ever been in a store and had a compulsion to buy something? You can't say why you need it in this moment, but you know that's it's (going to be) important? Well, that's how it was with this smokey quartz; I bought it a month or so ago, "just because." (ha.) The "just because" has been revealed to me...this stone induces Very Deep Trance States! She's a keeper. ;-)
Along the way, in this journey, I have felt myself...shift. The negatives switched to positives. I created Words of Power to repudiate the Shadows. This morning, I removed the "lovely bones" from around my neck for the last time.

I mentioned my father's passing earlier, on purpose. This past Monday (8/3) marked nineteen years since that fate*full day. There has arisen an energetic vortex that swirls around me on this day; it arrived on my calendar just after I'd exited the Moon Lodge, so yah, here's the "wild" of the "wild ride" I've been on! Add some new high-intensity clients at work, and throw in a little sleep deprivation just for spice...this past week has been chock-full of Special High Intensity Training! (lol)
But, here I stand, on the other side of it, re-invented once more. :-)

I have a little ways to go yet with the "lovely bones," using them to make a Transformation Arrow to be burned, and finish the releasingway. However, the heavy lifting is done.
Good thing, because I have a "play-date" tomorrow in Encinitas...

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